mycrosstobear | Mask or Menace

[Cecelia's already feeling off-center in the discussion, so it's easy to stay quiet and listen. in fact, it's very easy, as she realizes what he's talking about is something personal. he doesn't open up much unless it's in vague ways, so this actually has her holding her breath and listening quite intently.

she stayed quiet for moments thereafter, remembering to breathe again while running the story back through her head. her brow furrows a bit.

the story he tells...sounds more like just that -- a story.]

How did he...turn around like that without...being crushed by guilt? What of his conscience?

[Well, he can't speak to Livio's experience on that front. They hadn't exactly had a chance to talk about much of the future, let alone issues like guilt.

But he can guess.]

Because there are more important things than your own guilt.

...

[she's quiet for a moment, ruminating on that. he's not wrong, but thinking on the people she knows, the way they are...the way she is...

she wonders if she could ever be that selfless.

hesitantly, peering sidelong his way:] ...Are you still friends with him?

[He hasn't looked back up quite yet.]

Yeah.

[As much as he can be, to anyone back in his world, given...well. But if Livio were to appear here, they'd still be friends.]

...

[again, she falls quiet, trying to quickly come to conclusions on all this on-the-spot. not easy; she prefers time to sit back and really ruminate on information before blurting out opinions on things that have weight. it's rare she does, considering how quickly flustered she gets in the moment, but when conditions are ideal...!

so...maybe she won't?

and while we're at it, she's not a fan of the idea of pressing too much on a touchy subject, considering how she herself feels when the shoe's on the other foot. and yet:]

...Do you miss him?

[He misses Livio. He misses the girls. He misses Aunt Melanie and the kids at the orphanage. He misses Vash. He misses everyone, as hard as he tries not to think of it as month after month passes without the Porter bringing in any of them.

But he'd known what he was doing. He just...knows that somewhere different, now.]

Yeah. [This conversation is a lot. And a lot about him, drawing words out heavily. He tries to sound more casual.] Don't you have people you miss from your world?

[with a slight falter:] O-of course! Of course... [anxiously, her grip on the rail relaxes, then tightens again after drumming her fingers a bit.]

Only... I guess...

I don't think they miss me. Or...would, if they knew.

[a beat.

hastily shaking her head:] But that's an...entirely different conversation, isn't it? Gods, and, like. A miserable one at that. So let's not go there. Sorry. Look--I--

[she looks up, stuck for words for a moment.]

...Sorry. For being nosy. I'll stop.

[He knows better than to be nosy in turn. He really does. Drop it, move on with whatever normal (or "normal") things that come up instead.

She's really been lonely, hasn't she?]

...I bet they'd miss you more than you think.

[in a scoff:] You don't know them. But whatever! [she lifts her hands, shaking her head.] Enough, enough of that! I, like--Um. I have to get to work now. Sorry. I'lllll...I mean, we'll chat later. Okay? Okay. Bye!

[she gets up and scurries inside, closing the door behind her.]

[He has his mouth open to make some mild comment about how certain people can surprise you, but then she's gone.

Well. That sure was a conversation. Not one he expected, but...not actually one he feels bad about.]

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